Happiness Q & A
Answers to these questions are based on the findings of researchers in the field of Positive Psychology, particularly that of Dr. Sonja Lyubomirski. References to the Buddhist philosophy of happiness primarily reflects writings of the Dalai Lama and selected Buddhist monks.
Q. What is happiness?
A. Researchers in the field of Positive Psychology use the term happiness interchangeably with the term well-being. Happiness is described as the experience of joy, contentment or positive well-being, combined with a sense that one’s life is good, meaningful and worthwhile. Buddhist traditions speak in terms of equanimity, or peace of mind.
Q. What determines how happy I am?
A. In her book, The How of Happiness, Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky points out that your happiness level will be impacted by three main factors: A) Your genetic set point (your happiness level as determined by heredity) 50%, B) your circumstances (10%), and 3) your intentional activities–how you use your thinking and the activities you engage in (40%).
Q. What is the greatest myth about happiness?
A. The greatest myth about happiness is that a person can “find” happiness. Happiness (or unhappiness) isn’t caused by other people in your life. Nor is it caused by a particular set of circumstances such as having (or not having) the perfect job, the perfect spouse, the perfect house, or even achieving the perfect weight! It’s not your circumstances–what happens to you in life–that determines your happiness level. It’s what you tell yourself about what happens (your self-talk, your perspective.) Suspend your belief that happiness or lack of it is caused by “finding” something outside yourself. Consider, instead, that your happiness level is directly tied to your thoughts and the actions you take.
Q. Are there specific things that I can do that will increase my happiness level?
A. Let’s look first at what you cannot change: You cannot change your genetic set point (your usual happiness level as determined by heredity). It is, by definition, resistant to change. Also, it is often impractical if not impossible, to change your circumstances. The good news, however, is that research has determined that 40% of your happiness is determined by something you can control–what you do and how you think. These are described as intentional activities and strategies. In summary, your intentional activities have greater impact on how happy you are than the effects of your genetic set point or your life circumstances.
Q. How does one achieve happiness?
A. Much has been written regarding how you can achieve happiness. Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, researcher in the field of Positive Psychology, has identified the following 12 activities as being important factors in raising your happiness level:
- Counting your blessings (gratitude)
- Cultivate optimism (looking on the bright side of things)
- Avoiding overthinking or upward social comparison
- Practicing acts of kindness
- Nurturing relationships
- Doing more activities that truly engage you.
- Replaying and savoring life’s joys
- Committing to your goals
- Developing strategies for coping
- Learning to forgive
- Practicing religion and spirituality
- Taking care of your body (and mind)